Speak

I used to have a problem where I blurt out whatever was on my mind.
Now I stopped. I over think everything before I say it.
Because I know things cannot be unsaid.

I wish I never told you I loved you.

Now things are so bottled up I'm killing myself.
I'm a million secrets ready to spill.

I've ruined too much of my life to change again.
I need to. But I don't want to.
Maybe its better for everyone that I leave forever.



-Kathy C.

Rose

Red rose of happiness
You're lavished with kisses
But none are honestly true
They only know what they want from you

All you perceive is the sun
Love and warmth from everyone
Along with a proposal they speak of
Red rose for a false love

Black rose for a black heart
Romance starts to fall apart
All you can but dream
Stop the blood stream and scream

Words this pale face left unsaid
You lie vapid on her death bed
Thorns prick with love's regret
Black rose of the dead




Happy Valentine's Day. I hope all the world is happy even though I'm dying.

-Kathy C.

Confess

Emerging pitch blackness.

Scattered cemetery roses.

Whispering silence,

Piercing breeze.

Savor blood and bitterness.

Pain will not confess.



-Kathy C.

How I'll Die

Inject the venom.

Drink down the poison.

Breathe in the acetone.

This is how I'll die alone.



-Kathy C.

Weakness...

I'm weak.
I will bend, give, and break with a little push.
And here I thought picking up that razor blade was the strongest I've ever been.
But I've come to realize cutting shows I'm the weakest I ever was.
It can only keep me alive for so long.
I'm ready to go.




-Kathy C.

What Hurts...

Maybe what hurts is that I die a little more every day.
And every day nothing changes.

You don't change.
I don't change.
We with the world stay the same.

Like my lifeless body lies there as the world keeps spinning.

And you, just pass by, smiling at me,
not knowing the pain I have inside.



-Kathy C.

Words

Nothing anyone felt can be described with anything at all.
Words are created to try to explain the unimaginable feelings we have, the feelings we can touch with our hearts.
The word feel doesn't truly describe the state of feeling.
The word happy completely lessens the way I felt when you lied about loving me.
The word love is absolutely inaccurate.
Words, come close, but just isn't it.
Silence, is when you are most deep in emotion, it brings together so much more than words can say.
What do I feel for you?
*Silence*



-Kathy C.